Guess the Malady

Tigers relief pitcher Joel Zumaya- who has suffered injuries in past seasons from both playing Guitar Hero and from rescuing baseball memorabilia from his parents’ burning home- is back in camp and hoping to contribute. Shysterball guesses what Zumaya’s next injury will be:

Elbow strain, Hamstring, Oblique strain, Eye strain, Biliousness, Pregnancy (wife), Pregnancy (own), Guitar Hero, Halo 3, Burger Time, Rickets, Alien hand syndrome, Restless leg syndrome, Tommy John surgery, Joel Zumaya surgery (to be named upon discovery of new malady), Blackwater Fever, Consumption, Rotator cuff, Cuff links (in eye), Familial hyperlipoproteinemia type III, Spontaneous polydactylism, Beri-Beri, The Yips, Riley-Day syndrome, Stockholm syndrome, Capgras syndrome, Tendenitis, Dislocated shoulder, Located shoulder, The Willies, Munchausen syndrome, Field

My money’s on Myxomatosis.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s