“Sucker Punch” Sucks I

It’s emerging as the most hated movie of the year, although the Sandler comedy that began with 10 minutes of Jewish-chicks-are-ugly jokes was much worse in my opinion. It’s led to some high-quality snark, however.
We start with “TK” of Pajiba, who until I hear otherwise I’m going to picture as former Twins manager Tom Kelly:

Its as if Snyder spent a weekend dropping acid and playing every video game he could find, and developed a series of hallucination-based short films. Then, he came up with a sordid, melodramatic-as-fuck story about young girls trapped in a brothel/insane asylum/burlesque club/Dickensian shithole. Then, he decided he was gonna get all girl-powered and developed his own brand of lingerie-inspired pedophelia-themed feminism. Then he took all of those things, stuffed them into a bag three sizes to small, and then beat the fucking bag with hammers until he shit himself. He then topped off the bag with feces, and hit me in the face with it. In short, Zack Snyder is an asshole.

I hope nothing I create ever inspires such vitriol.


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